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Adam

5/8/2013

7 Comments

 
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In spite of his social challenges, Adam, a lonely man with Asperger's Syndrome, begins a romantic relationship with his neighbor Beth.

Adam, a socially-awkward but intelligent man with Asperger's, struggles to get his life back on track after the death of his father and the loss of his job.  Adam copes by rigidly following a regular schedule that includes engaging in the same activities day after day.  He is thrown for a loop, however, when he meets Beth.  The two start up a friendship that blossoms into a romantic relationship.  As their relationship develops, the couple face increasing challenges as they try to understand one another and they begin to question whether a relationship between a man with Asperger's and a neurotypical woman can survive.

Neuropsychological Review
Romantic Relationships for Individuals with Asperger’s Syndrome 
Kristina E. Patrick

Movies often depict individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) as loners who reject opportunities for social relationships.  In actuality, those with high-functioning... 

ASDs such as Asperger’s Syndrome are often very interested in social, and even romantic and sexual, relationships (Ousley & Mesibov, 1991).   Adam, a dramatic film starring Hugh Dancy and Rose Byrne, chronicles the romantic relationship between Adam, a young man with Asperger’s Syndrome, and his neighbor Beth (Urdang, Pencier, Vanech, & Mayer, 2009).  The film highlights the difficulties that many individuals with Asperger’s and their partners face throughout the course of a romantic relationship. 

            Adam opens with the title character, a man in his twenties with Asperger’s Syndrome, coping with the death of his father and his newfound independence.  In addition to grieving his recent loss, Adam is experiencing difficulties at work and financial hardship.  He has formed very few friendships and has difficulty navigating social situations.  Shortly after his father’s death, Adam meets a woman, Beth, who has just moved into his building.  Beth and Adam become friends and quickly develop feelings of attraction for one another.

            As Adam and Beth progress through a dating relationship, they face numerous difficulties resulting from Adam’s Asperger’s Syndrome.  Adam has difficulty interacting appropriately with Beth’s friends and family, and he rarely knows how Beth is feeling or what she is thinking.  While Beth is going through family difficulties, Adam does not know how to support or comfort her.  The relationship is further complicated by Adam’s difficulty in finding a new job after he is fired.  Despite these difficulties, Beth and Adam are able to connect with and learn from each other and their initial attraction develops into an intimate and meaningful relationship.

            Although most individuals with Asperger’s Syndrome are interested in pursuing romantic and sexual relationships, their interpersonal skill deficits can often make initiating and maintaining a relationship difficult (Attwood, 2009).  As one individual with Asperger’s expressed, “I want a close and long-term relationship but I just don’t seem to know how to manage or maintain them; I wish I knew how and when to do this” (Jones & Meldal, 2001).  In the film Adam, a relationship falls into the title character’s lap.  In reality, this rarely happens.  Most individuals with Asperger’s spend a long time pursuing relationships, with the guidance of family, friends, and even therapists, before they are able to adequately initiate a romantic relationship.

            As portrayed in the film, people with Asperger’s tend to experience difficulties expressing emotions and interpreting the thoughts and emotions of others.  This can lead to faux pas and behaviors that may come off as insensitive or offensive (Baron-Cohen, O’Riordan, Stone, Jones, & Plaisted, 1999).  In the film, Adam’s difficulties in these areas often complicate his relationship with Beth.  For instance, Adam is unable to interpret Beth’s emotional distress over her family problems or to make inferences about Beth’s desire for a sexual relationship with him.  In addition, Adam cannot appropriately interact with Beth’s friends and family.  When asked whether he would like to see pictures of Beth’s friends’ new baby, Adam frankly answers, “No, thanks.”  Adam also tends to perseverate on his favorite topics without noticing when Beth’s parents become disinterested.  As a result, Beth finds it difficult to integrate Adam into her social and family circle. 

            Individuals with Asperger’s often find it difficult to express affection for the purposes of showing love or repairing someone’s feelings (Attwood, 2009).  When Beth becomes upset, Adam tells her he sees that she is upset but does not know what to do about it.  Beth specifically instructs him to give her a hug and he is then able to do so.  In this case, Adam’s inability to infer an appropriate social response as well as his likely lack of desire for physical affection inhibit Adam’s ability to effectively comfort his partner without guidance.  In another instance, Beth apologizes for an argument that she had with Adam and tells him that he can also apologize.  Adam replies, “But you said it was your fault.”  Like many individuals with Asperger’s, Adam does not understand when or how to express affection or remorse for the purpose of repairing hurt feelings. 

            For Adam, words are taken very literally.  He has difficulty understanding sarcasm, symbolic language, or lies.  When Adam discovers that Beth lied to him about a meeting with her parents, he is unable to understand Beth’s motives and becomes extremely upset.  Using “All or None” thinking that is common for individuals with ASDs (Yapko, 2010), Adam accuses Beth of being a liar and tells her that he hates her.  While this reaction highlights some of the difficulties that individuals with Asperger’s face in understanding others’ intentions and tolerating flexible constructs, Adam’s reaction in the film is somewhat extreme.  It is unlikely at that stage of Adam’s life that he would have never been lied to before by a loved one or that he would be unable to understand a lie. 

            In general, the portrayal of Adam and Beth’s relationship represents a somewhat stereotypical model of a romance between a man with Asperger’s and a woman who is not on the autism spectrum.  In some ways, Adam is a very extreme example of an individual with ASD.  He melts down in response to sensory overload and during his confrontation with Beth about lying to him.  These meltdowns are exaggerated, particularly given the high level of independent functioning that Adam exhibits in other areas.  Also, Adam has great difficulty with understanding the needs of others unless they are extremely direct with him.  While this is very often the case with individuals with ASD, it is unlikely that this deficit would go as far as it does with Adam who does not understand, “Could you give me a hug?” until it is rephrased as, “I want you to give me a hug.”  Adam’s extreme reactions to overstimulation and his level of cluelessness about others’ thoughts and intentions represent a stereotypical view of Asperger’s that is not a true representation of the ASD population.

            In contrast to some specific extreme difficulties, Adam is able to handle other challenges quite easily.  He lives independently, maintaining an organized and clean home.  When Adam has social difficulties, he is able to rise above them with a little coaxing from Beth.  For instance, Adam is initially unable to gather the courage to attend a social event with Beth.  However, a short time later, Adam attends a party with Beth and is able to navigate the social scene with only minor difficulties and faux pas.  Likewise, Adam’s interview skills improve dramatically with coaching from Beth over a few weeks.  In fact, at the end of the film, it appears that Adam has become almost proficient at navigating a variety of social contexts.  This depiction gives the viewer the impression that if ASD individuals simply gain insight into their social problems, then they will easily be able to solve them.  In reality, many individuals with ASDs have great insight into their problems and understand that other people function differently than they do (Jones & Meldal, 2001).  However, understanding how neurotypical individuals behave versus actually behaving with social proficiency are two dramatically different things.  Many individuals with ASDs become overwhelmed by attempts to execute a variety of “normal” social functions while also concentrating on the content of conversation.  As a result, the type of social functioning exhibited by non-spectrum individuals is generally quite difficult for ASD individuals in practice even when they can understand the appropriate behaviors conceptually.

            Adam is one of the few films that deals with how romantic relationships can develop between individuals with ASDs and non-spectrum partners.  The film is refreshing in its accurate assertion that individuals with Asperger’s Syndrome are not only interested in romantic relationships but are also often quite capable of engaging in them successfully.  Where the film falters is in its simplification of the social difficulties that individuals with Asperger’s face.  Asperger’s Syndrome and other ASDs are lifelong disorders that pervasively affect the lives of those diagnosed.  While there is no quick fix to the difficulties that ASD individuals face, people on the spectrum are often quite insightful and are able to function in a “neurotypical” society.  Rather than highlighting the challenges of dating a man with Asperger’s Syndrome, Adam may have better served the viewer by depicting a relationship between two people, one of whom just happens to have Asperger’s.

References

Attwood, T. (2009). Relationship problems of adults with Asperger’s syndrome. Good Autism Practice, 8(1), pp. 13-20.

Baron-Cohen, S., O’Riordan, M., Stone, V., Jones, R., & Plaisted, K. (1999). Recognition of Faux Pas by normally developing children and children with Asperger’s syndrome or high-functioning autism. Autism and Developmental Disorders, 29(5), pp. 407-418.

Jones, R. S. P. & Meldal, T. O. (2001). Social relationships and Asperger’s syndrome: A qualitative analysis of first-hand accounts. Journal of Intellectual Disabilities, 5(1), pp. 35-41.

Ousley, O. Y. & Mesibov, G. B. (1991). Sexual attitudes and knowledge of high-functioning adolescents and adults with autism. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 21(4), pp. 471-481.

Urdang, L., De Pencier, M., Vanech, D. (Producers) & Mayer, M. (Director). (2009). Adam [Motion picture]. United States: Fox Searchlight Pictures.

Yapko, D. (2010). Chapter 10: Do you see the forest or the tree?: Utilizing client interests and strengths in a case of Asperger’s syndrome. In Burns, G. W. (ed). Happiness, healing, enhancement: Your casebook collection for applying positive psychology in therapy. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
7 Comments
Terri Geiss
5/13/2013 10:46:08 am

Interesting review - makes me want to watch this movie.

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Jillian Born
11/24/2013 01:55:26 pm

I feel this review did a very good job at pointing out the places in which the movie Adam both excelled in portraying a character with Asperger’s Syndrome and where it slipped in its portrayal. I saw this movie a number of years ago and could not fully recall the plot. The review did a good job of highlighting the key scenes and subplots of the movie to help jog my memory. I like how it was pointed out that many people with Asperger’s show an interest in pursuing romantic relationships; they just have a slightly more difficult time in both beginning and maintaining them. Many people often stereotype that anyone on the autism spectrum are asexual, which is not the case at all. The character Adam in this movie helps demonstrate how this common and rude assumption is incorrect.
I also agree that some of Adam’s reactions are over the top, as is the case in many movies, which depict a mental or behavioral disorder/illness. Often the filmmakers have their characters portray the common symptoms and stereotypes of the illness, which may not always be how the disease actually presents itself. Like the author pointed out, one could ignore the fact that Adam has Asperger’s Syndrome and perceive this movie simply as a movie displaying the common ups and downs of a romantic relationship between two people.

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Mallory Ann
11/24/2013 08:59:41 pm

I have previously watched this movie on my own, and I found that the reviewer did a great job summarizing the movie without leaving anything important to the story line out. While I found it to be a good movie, I agree with the review that there were many times that the behavior of Adam was amplified and was pretty stereotypical. Yes, some individuals with ASD can be expressed on a continuum of severity. However, as the reviewer said, Adam's independence level and his age made not only his outbursts unrealistic, but the context that caused him to become extremely upset would have no likely done so in a real-life situation. In addition, I also agree with the reviewer that while most people believe that those with ASD have no attraction to others/are asexual, this movie took a cool stance against that with portraying the romance between a person with ASD and a person without ASD.

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Trang Do
2/14/2016 05:16:41 pm

I agree with your points after I finished the movie. The movie has a good start to present a conflict that an mentally disabled individual has to support himself after losing his caregiver. However later on, I think the context presented in this movie is not totally convincing and realistic for an ASD person. For example, Adam's independence, and his seem-to-be-normal ability to speak make him appear more like a reserved introvert, rather than an individual with ASD. However the movie did depict well the reaction of ASD people in social situation or to a relationship. I also think the reason Adam can be well-functioned compared to most other ASD people is that he has lived in supportive environment since young age. He has been taken care of by his father, and after the father's death, he's in romantic relationship with Beth who is able to accept him.

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Nick H.
1/17/2014 06:56:55 am

Adam

I saw Adam a few years ago and I believe this review was far better than one you would find on any website similar to IMDB. After finishing the reading I felt as if I watched the movie again. The review even mentions one of the best parts when Adam is asked if he would like to see pictures or video of the baby and says “No”. I thought it was funny.
According to autisim.org.uk and similar sites such as psychcentral.com engaging in a relationship as an individual with Asperger’s is extremely difficult and takes a lot of work. Hollywood however does as they always do and develops a fast relationship between the two characters Adam and Beth.
Adam’s difficulty expressing emotion (Emotional Intelligence or EI) is a common problem associated with Asperger syndrome, displayed correctly during the film. I was previously unaware of the term emotional intelligence and the four attributes: Relationship management, Self-awareness, Self-management, and Social awareness. I believe I now have a better understanding of Asperger’s as well as a greater respect for those diagnosed struggling just to “fit in” as many have said.

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Jesse B
3/4/2015 07:40:53 am

I had seen this movie a few years ago and upon re-watching, I notice that the review of the film does a good job of highlighting the most important parts that show how difficult it can be for an individual with an Autism Spectrum Disorder to function when their daily routine is interrupted. For most of his life, Adam’s father had taken care of him but with his father’s sudden death, Adam has being forced to become a functioning adult in society overnight, despite his ADS.
To me, one of the most important parts of the film that the review mentions is once Beth and Adam are already in a relationship, Adam has trouble feeling empathy for Beth and has trouble relating to her problems. He wants to be able to be there for her and support her but does not know exactly how to go about doing this. I think that this is one of the hardest problems someone with ADS struggles with because if you cannot relate with people, you become some sort of an outcast, which is when the social anxiety sets in.
Lastly, I think this review does a good job of not only discussing which aspects of ADS the film portrays well, but also the aspects of ADS the film does not such a good job of displaying. For example, most people who suffer from ADS do not just jump into a relationship with the first person the begin talking to, but usually it is a gradual process with help from loved ones along the way.

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Krista P.
11/24/2015 09:09:12 am

I watched Adam on HBO a little while ago, and I was impressed with the different take it took on a main character with an ASD. Usually movies with an ASD portray the character navigating simple social situations, and dealing with family and society at large, rather than the formation of a romantic relationship. The review did well at analyzing the accurate and inaccurate portrayls of Adam, and his relationship with Beth. As discussed, the quick and sudden initiation and formation of an intimate relationship is unusual in people with Asperger's, it is more likely for a relationship to begin slowly with support and guidance from friends and family members. The movie did well at portraying Adam's lack of theory of mind, which enables one to feel empathy towards others and know that people have thoughts different from his own. Granted, it was extreme at times for a person with Asperger's, as identified by the example in the review of Adam requiring Beth to rephrase her asking of a hug to telling him to give her a hug. This is more indicative of Autism, rather than Asperger's and detracts from Adams characterization. Regardless, it is nice to see a film portray a character with Asperger's forming a relationship because it shows to its viewers that people with ASD can form relationships, even intimate ones, with a bit of help, which aids in breaking the stereotype that all people with ASDs are incapable of interacting with others.

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